I have decided to do something culturally unacceptable. Some of you may be embarrassed for me when you see it, because I don’t have the good sense to be embarrassed myself apparently.

But bear with me for a minute first.

Have you ever been down on yourself?

Down in your self esteem? your view of how you look, act, react, and do anything that it is you do?

Down because of the hand you feel you were dealt?

Down because you didn’t get what you wanted?

Down because you did and now you don’t want it anymore?

Down because everyone thinks you have it together, and now….

you can’t let THEM down by letting them know you don’t…

have it all…

together?  (hmmmm, there is one of my big ones)

Down because you wake up on fire, you have your list, you are moving into a groove, when suddenly there is a diaper fail that causes a bath, laundry, mopping, and a trip to the store to buy something that will get that stink out of the pack and play.

Down because your body doesn’t look like the one on the cover of (insert the name of your favorite) magazine?

Well, have you? I have.

From time to time.

Lately though I have seen this changing in me. I’ve seen my perspective shift on a more regular basis. Maybe this is because of more regular quiet time this year, maybe it’s because I know I’ve never had so many people pray for me over this year as I have in years past. (thank you to the prayer warriors) Maybe it’s because I’m memorizing more scripture. Maybe it’s God using all of that together.

This past Sunday I was frowning at my belly. I could stand to do a few sit ups, I ain’t going to lie, but there is only so much that exercise is going to do for a belly that has housed 3 babies over 9 pounds each. But in a quiet moment, while I was blow drying my hair (trust me, it was quieter than the previously mentioned 3 babies) it occurred to me that …

…this belly…

…this vessel…

was the PERFECT result of some of the best things that God has ever allowed to happen to me.

How dare I loath it?

Perspective. Accept the gift.